Shocked to the Core When We Found Out Why
Our young daughter’s daycare was meant to be her happy place. But then the tears and the tantrums started, and she began to hate the word “daycare” at every mention of it. We were devastated to learn the horrifying truth that lay behind those joyful, bright doors.
At 6:30 a.m., the clock on my nightstand flickered. With a sigh, I prepared myself for yet another morning of crying and losing my cool. Next to me, my spouse Dave awakened, the same worry engraved on his face that had become a spectral presence in the last several weeks.
He said, “Maybe today will be different,” but his lack of conviction revealed his genuine emotions.
I wanted to convey even that small hope, but the image of our daughter Lizzie’s face smeared with tears was still too vivid, too recent.
This has not always been the case. Lizzie had been thrilled when we had first registered her at Happy Smiles Daycare. Talking nonstop, our vivacious four-year-old was talking about the toys, the friendly teachers, the vibrant playrooms, and all the new friends she would be making.
Drop-offs were a breeze for the first several days, with Lizzie virtually tugging us through the doors with her eagerness. However, that thrill was only present for two weeks. Then everything seemed to alter over night.
At first, there was resistance. drooping feet, eyes beseeching.
Lizzie started crying one morning when I was helping her put on her favorite purple jacket. “Mom, no childcare! Please! Send me nowhere, please.”
I was taken aback by the abrupt outburst and froze.
“What’s wrong, sweetie? I believed you enjoyed being there.”
With tears welling up in her small body, Lizzie simply shook her head.
With a worried expression on his face, Dave emerged from the doorway. “Everything okay?”
I gave a headshake. “She doesn’t want to go to daycare.”
“Camila, it’s just a regular childhood thing. She’ll be OK, don’t worry,” Dave reassured.
But it developed into a full-blown frenzy in a matter of days.
Our once-bubbly little daughter turned into a screaming, crying disaster at the sound of the word “daycare.” The change was as abrupt as it was devastating.
We asked Lizzie the same questions over and over, but she never answered. Despite our gentle prodding, she remained unmoving.
We made every effort. rewards, motivational speeches, and even allowing her to bring her cherished plush animal, Mr. Snuggles. Nothing was successful. Every morning turned into a struggle of wills, exhausting us all mentally before the day was even half over.
We spoke with her daycare staff because we were worried. After we left, they assured us Lizzie was alright—quiet, maybe a little reclusive, but not in any obvious suffering. The knot of worry in my stomach was not much relieved by their remarks.
I told Dave, “I don’t understand,” one evening after yet another demanding day. “She adored it there once. What might have been different?
Dave scowled at his thoughts. He said, “I have an idea,” very slowly. “It’s a bit… unorthodox, but it might help us figure out what’s going on.”
He described his strategy, which was to conceal a tiny microphone within Mr. Snuggles. I felt disturbed with the thought. It felt like a breach of Lizzie’s trust, intrusive.
But I realized we needed to take action as I thought back to her distraught cries and tear-streaked face.
“All right,” I muttered. “Let’s do it.”
The following morning, we proceeded with our customary ritual of sobbing and pleading, with the microphone securely nestled within Mr. Snuggles and connected to an application on Dave’s phone.
Guilt and desperate hope swirled in my stomach as I strapped Lizzie into her car seat. We have to figure out what’s bothering her today, I reasoned.
After putting her at the daycare, we withdrew to the parking lot, where Dave took out his phone and launched the microphone app.
We were treated to the typical sounds of a bustling daycare for a few minutes: kids laughing, toys clattering, teachers giving directions.
Then out of nowhere, a weird, garbled voice was heard above the din. We froze in dread as we turned up the volume.
“Hey, whiner. Miss me?
Dave and I looked at each other, surprised. This was no grown-up. It was a different kid.
The voice went on, “Remember, the monster will come for you and your parents if you tell anyone.” That’s not what you want, do you?
Lizzie murmured, her little voice barely audible, “No, please go away. I’m afraid.
“Well done, girl. Give your snack to me now. In any case, you don’t deserve it.
I felt a wave of terror as Dave’s hold on the phone grew more firm. Was our daughter the target of bullying? How could it have escaped the teachers’ notice?
Wordlessly, we ran back to the daycare.
We stormed through the doors, startling the receptionist. Mr. Thompson and Mrs. Thompson? Is everything in order?”
“Lizzie needs to be seen. Dave insisted, “Now.”
She guided us to Lizzie’s classroom, feeling our urgency despite her confusion.
We observed our kid curled up in a corner with Mr. Snuggles cradled against her chest via the observation glass. A girl who was a little older than Lizzie towered over her, her hand out in anticipation of Lizzie’s food.
With concern on her expression, the teacher came over to us. “Is something wrong?”
Dave played the recording wordlessly. As the teacher listened, her eyes grew wide with fear.
“That’s Carol,” she muttered, gesturing to the elder girl’s scowl. Yet I have never observed… I was clueless.”
“Well, now you do,” I said, unleashing my fierce protective nature. “And you’re going to do something about it.”
There was a flurry of activity during the next hour. The daycare director and Carol’s parents were summoned. Everyone’s expressions showed shock, bewilderment, and shame as we played the recording for them.
She murmured to Mr. Snuggles, “Carol said there were monsters in the daycare.” “Big, ominous ones with pointed fangs. She exhibited to me the images on her phone.”
“Carol said if I told anyone, the monsters would come and hurt you and Daddy.”
Dave whitened his knuckles on the steering wheel. “Oh, my dear, no monsters exist. Carol misled you.
Lizzie’s bottom lip quivered as she argued, “But the pictures…”
I extended my hand to clasp her hand. “My dear, those weren’t real. Carol was being incredibly cruel, making up tales to frighten you. Now that you’re secure, Mommy and Daddy are doing well too.”
Whimpering, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” “I was so scared.”
Squeezing her hand, Dave extended his arm back. “Pumpkin, you have nothing to apologize for. We’re quite happy with you for your bravery.”
After Lizzie slept soundly for the first time in weeks that evening, Dave and I reclined on the couch, exhausted on an emotional level.
I said, “I can’t believe we didn’t see it sooner,” as guilt began to bite at me.
Dave drew me in close. “We kept going until we found the problem even though we felt something wasn’t right. That is the important thing.
The days that followed were difficult. While we looked for a new daycare with more stringent supervision and a zero-tolerance bullying policy, we kept Lizzie at home.
To aid Lizzie in overcoming the trauma, we also enrolled her in a child psychologist’s program.
We were shocked to hear from Carol’s parents. Their daughter’s behavior embarrassed them, so they asked whether we would be open to meeting. After a lengthy debate, we decided.
Although the conversation started off unpleasant, it soon became apparent that Carol had been having her own problems.
Her parents had recently divorced, and they were unaware of the ways in which she had been behaving out. They wanted to make apologies and were receiving her assistance.
Carol’s mother said, “We’re so sorry,” with tears in her eyes. Carol’s capability was unknown to us. We fully understand if you choose to take additional action, and we’re taking steps to address her behavior.”
Dave and I looked at each other. “Thank you for being honest,” I uttered hesitantly. “At the moment, getting Lizzie to feel safe again is our first priority. But we also hope Carol receives the support she requires.”
Lizzie pulled at my hand as we were leaving the conference. “Mommy, how did you know I was scared at daycare?” she muttered.
I hesitated, not sure how to describe our unconventional approach. I gave her a final squeeze of the nose while grinning. “Because parents are superhuman beings. We are always aware when our children require assistance.”
Lizzie’s eyes grew wide with curiosity. “Really?”
I told her, “Really,” “And we’ll be here to protect you at all times. Whatever the case may be.”
I made a solemn commitment to myself as we walked to the car to always follow my gut when it came to Lizzie’s safety. Though we had been fortunate this time, the event had taught us a priceless lesson: you can never be too watchful or too involved when it comes to your children.